Dancing Dreams

I know I haven't posted in forever. Yes, there is a reason for that, as for the most part I don't really use this journal. This is just a public service announcement to let you know that I am participating in NaNoWriMo. You say WHAAAAAAA? National Novel Writing Month. Every November a bunch of insane people around the world decide it's a good idea to attempt to write a 50,000 word novel in a month.This year I decided to join them. You can watch my pitiful attempts at my new NaNoWriMo specific journal nanoelle_blum.

Please hold off any mockery until November 30th. Should I fail at my attempt I demand that you mock me until next November when I attempt it again. I'm giving up many of the usual pleasures to try to accomplish this. We'll see how long it lasts. At the moment I don't even have a solid idea for a story. But it's all good. I still have a week before I have to start writing.

If you think this sounds interesting and would like to participate in the insanity check out NaNoWriMo.org The expectation of this contest is not to write well. It's simply to write. Output is all that matters. Well and enjoying the insanity of it all.

So come join me on my journey through hell for the next month and get ready to support me when the characters do stupid things and mock me when December 1st rolls around. You must not accept any excuses for my failure!!!

You Are Miss Piggy

A total princess and diva, you're totally in charge - even if people don't know it. You want to be loved, adored, and worshiped. And you won't settle for anything less. You're going to be a total star, and you won't let any of the "little people" get in your way. Just remember, piggy, never eat more than you can lift!

You Are Lightning

Beautiful yet dangerous People will stop and watch you when you appear Even though you're capable of random violence You are best known for: your power Your dominant state: performing

Man. So true. Kinda nice that I am my favorite atmospherical event. Yes, I know I made up a word!

Who Should Paint You: Pablo Picasso

Your an expressive soul who shows many emotions, with many subtleties Only a master painter could represent your glorious contradictions

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free. In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved. You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change. You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please. Your ideal relationship is comforting. You crave a relationship where you always feel warmth and love. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage pessimistically. You don't think happy marriages exist anymore. In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

Don't think that last one is true at all. But I mean judging from the test I don't know that it could honestly give a correct answer anyway. lol

So yes, dear Lauren, you are not the only one who has no life, I mean swears that you have one.

hehe

~Elyse

Wow.

It's been the strangest weekend of my life, perhaps.

Friday night- Saturday. Spent some time with a great guy that made me realize, I'm not over Justin in the slightest.

Saturday Afternoon- Make silly decision that ending all contact between me and Justin will make me get over him.

Saturday Night- Go see Heidi Chronicles After three hours of self imposed Justin-exile I am desperately worried about my mental state, and realize. You idiot! You're not supposed to be over him YET. You only broke up three friggin weeks ago. Give yourself time and thus I have concluded I will place my trust in God and time to heal the heart.

Sunday- Spend all day in PJs. Don't leave dorm. First day in my life I have ever enjoyed being blatantly lazy.

Sunday Night- Rhi asks me to go to the AXP Party, so I think, sure it would be fun. Was worried it would be awkward now that I am not with Justin anymore. On the other hand, I felt more comfortable tonight than I ever did before. Hung out with a bunch of awesome guys. Got to know Mike Spears a little better and have decided that we must hang out more. Rhi said she's gonna be my roommate next year and she totally made my day. Was blatantly hit on all night by Monk. (shivers) Also hit on my several other party members. Must say it's a new experience for me. Hardly any of them were datable but it's all good. Was about to leave and somehow I was convinced to stay and drink. Ended up staying their with Ed, Joey and Monk and had a heated religious debate at 2am. Joey informed me he would 'do me like I do my girlfriend, but you'd slap me' Was so flattered. (rolls eyes) But it was an interesting night, and in a way made me enjoy being single and at the same time made me hate it.

Anyway. I do have class tomorrow. And it is 3:30 so I should go.

But it's been an interesting weekend to say the least. Perhaps the second most painful weekend of my life, but interesting.

Oh and who one the game? hehehe. I think I missed the whole super bowl part of superbowl sunday

List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they’re any good, but they must be songs you’re really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your LiveJournal along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they’re listening to.

1. As the Rush Comes- Motorcycle
2. After All- Delerium
3. Shivers- DJ Armin Van Buuren
4. Satellite- OceanLab
5. Run For It- Delerium
6. Only Time- Enya
7. Just Be- DJ Tiesto

Tagging:

Juice
Rhi
Biggs
Asura
Kevin
Jill
Ummm Can't think of anyone else I know on LJ that I hasn't been tagged already

So I'm gonna give this regular updating thing another try.

Am officially moved into my new room at Jordan Center. Must say I love it even if it is the ghetto of Elon. It is effin great to be here! hehe. You should definitely stop by and see me if you are at Elon. Have started a new job babysitting and will be applying for a second job with Elite. Won't leave me much time between homework and work to do anything performance wise, but such is life, right?

Class today: Ballet at 8am. Have a feeling that it may be too easy for me. But maybe if I work on my feet a bit she will let me do the class on pointe. yay!
hehe. lol. Then I had acting which looks like it is going to be Awesome. Not sure how I feel about Michael Flannery (the professor) yet but I'm sure I will have a ball. Was so mad when I didn't get the chance to perform today. But I'll get to go first on Thursday. Yay! Acting rocks!!!

Tomorrow=The day from hell. Here is my schedule:
8-9:10- Arts Seminar with Dr. Tucker
9:20-10:30- MY ONLY FREE TIME!
10:40-11:50- Jazz
12-1:10- Modern
1:20-3- Intro to Dance
3:10-4:50- Creative Writing.

I may just be screwed. lol!
Other than that I don't know that I have much else to say. My visit with my mom went well. Have decided to go home for spring break and um have a feeling that this will be a great semester...

Will right again tomorrow...if I survive!

Name 21 people you know. Don't look at the questions until you've got your 21 names. Then answer the questions.

1. Rhi
2. Lauren L
3. Brittney
4. Justin
5. Allison
6. Jill
7. Dave
8. Alex
9. Adam
10. Laura
11. Brian
12. Joe
13. Julz
14. Erica
15. Stephen
16. Bekah
17. Caitlin
18. Liz
19. Durani
20. Staci
21. Gabi

THE QUESTIONS:

1. How did you meet 14? Hmm. Well facebook and then we were in Intro to Theatre together

2. What would you do if you never met number 6? My life would be very empty. Jill is the best roomie in the world!

3. What would you do if 20 and 9 dated? Oh god. Considering Adam is a junior in college and Staci is a 7th grader that I know from dance I would report them to the police and then puke.

4. Did you ever like 5? No, but we share an ex-bf

5. Would 12 and 15 make a good couple? I'm thinking No. Two guys, long distance relationship. One's IN a relationship. One's still getting over one. Yeah, sounds like a match made nowhere

6. Describe 8: Of course it would be Alex I must describe. Alex is Alex. Nuff said.

7. Do you think 19 is attractive? Yes, but I am afraid he's gay. Met him when we were both drunk at caitlins the other day.

8. Tell me something humiliating about 17? um...I don't know that I know anything humiliating about Caitlin. She's awesome.

9. Do you know any of 4's family members? Indeed I do. I've spent the night at his house several times. They are pretty darn cool.

10. What's 21's favorite color? Um...Pink? for ballet? I don't know.

11. What would you do if 18 just confessed they liked you? Um..nothing.

12. What language does 20 speak? Staci language.

13. Who is number 17 going out with? no one.

14. What grade is 16 in? Junior in college.

15. When's the last time you talked to 13? Gosh, forever. Before the new year?

16. What is 2's favorite band? Hmm I don't know...but she does own some pretty embarassing CDs. hehe

17. Would you ever date 11? I already have!

18. Would you ever date 1? I can just imagine my families reaction. First a black man, not a GIRL?!

19. Is 9 single? Nope.

20. What is 19's last name? no clue. Drunk meeting.

21. Would you ever want to be in a serious relationship with 2? Serious as in she's my cousin and that's incest people!

22. What school does 3 go to? CW Post in Long Island.

23. Where does 10 live? Durham

24. Are 7 and 8 best friends? Nope. Don't know each other.

25. Do you like 4? Haha. Considering he's my recent ex-bf I sure hope I like him at least a little.

Justin and I have separated for good this time. It was again a mutual decision and we both know it is the right thing to do. I love him very much. It's hard to not think about it all right now. I already miss him, but time will make things better and it was the best thing for both of us. I'm just glad we were smart enough to realize we needed to call things off before our relationship in any respect was irrepairable and to realize that as much as we love each other it's not enough to keep us in a happy and successful relationship.

Things are rather hard right now. Which, I suppose is to be expected, after all it's been less than 12 hours. However, I have lots of people worrying and caring about me and all will be alright in the end.

But to Justin: Thank you for coming into my life. You are an amazing guy and I love you despire all that we have and are going through. I'll see you soon, my friend. You're the best.

Now I just have to try to find time to do my homework in between sleep, mood swings and whateverelse I must do. lol.

Talk to everyone soon.

~Elyse

P.S. If ANYONE knows where I can find a tv real cheap, I am dying for some video games...especially to keep my mind off things and all I'm missing is a friggin TV!

Hello Live Journal Buddies.

I have had one of the best New Year's possible. It was absolutely amazing. I didn't know what to expect going into the evening, but I have come out of the evening feeling better than I could have ever imagined. Thank you, Brittney for the awesome party you hosted. Thank you to all the Putnam Valley people who were there. I had such a great time and I look forward to repeating the experience.

It came to my attention last night that I told everyone that Justin and I broke up and never let you all know that we got back together. As Erinn said to me last night 'Once you go black, you never go back.' So I decided I wouldn't even bother to try. Just Kidding! Justin and I have worked things out and I'm looking forward to seeing him again.

I should be sleeping right now since I have to get up at 4:30am to catch a flight back to North Carolina. But ah well such is life.

Well I probably won't update for a bit as I'll be too busy hanging with Justin. lol! Can't wait to see my Elon buddies. Have a Happy New Year everyone!

Hope the start of your new year was as great as the start of mine!

~Elyse

Now that the whole emotional mess has been explained, It's time now to update you all on the hell of my physical health.

Have spent the whole of my fall semester being told by every doctor I've seen in NC that I have no problems and that it's all psychosomatic.

All blood tests have been negative. MRI's have been negative. Cat Scans have been Negative

Monday: See Neurologist. Completely blows me off because of psych history tells me he doesn't know what it is but it's not his field.
Tuesday: See Cardiologist. Doesn't blow me off but tells me to see a rheumatologist.
That night: spend night in bathroom. Now know it is a stomach virus as brother now doing the same. Have never been more violently sick in my life. Have lost four pounds in two days. Still not feeling the greatest.
Wednesday: In excruciating pain particularly in my joints. See General Physician. For once he doesn't blow off my problems as stress. Immediately schedules an appointment with Gynocologist? wtf?! because apparently some of the symptoms can be attributed to STD's.

On way to gynocologist car breaks down. Standing out in cold, crying with pain, just wanting some friggin meds. Finally get to the gynocologist. Dr. Florence. She says, what the hell are you doing here? you don't have an std! never the less, I'm put on the examining table, tested for STDs whcih let me tell you is NOT FUN although I'm sure it could be slightly more unpleasant for guys. Crying in pain because of my hips and having to lay on that stupid table. Then she pokes around on my abdomen causing me more pain and starts freaking out about the amount of pain I am in. Have a pelvic ultrasound done. That's negative. Sent over to the hospital to have a CAT scan of my pelvic area and abdomen. Made to drink a full 1000mL of liquid when i can barely keep down a ritz cracker. Drink it, go in to have IV but I can't get it because I've had an allergic reaction to a medication before in which I stopped breathing, so I drank all that crap for nothing. CAT scan done, totally negative. Go back to Dr. Florence. She orders blood work, including and HIV test. wtf?! and wants to talk about exploratory surgery to find out what's going on in my abdoment. Mom freaks out. General Doc won't give me pain meds because he was afraid it would change the results I have with rheumatolofist the next day. Go to sleep at 4:30 that afternoon, exhausted from pain and sleep for 15 hours straight.

Wake up this morning and head to rheumatologist, pain has lessened thankfully. Go in. Explain all my symptoms. Does a bunch of clinical tests. And diagnoses me with fibro myalgia.

So wtf is fibro myalgia? Good questions FMS (fibro myalgia syndrome) is a disease that many doctors don't even recognize as a disease. In fact it wasn't reconized by the WHO until 1993. It is a syndrome in which an individual experiences severe chronic pain for no identifiable reason in various and alternating places on the body. For me it is my joints, although it also manifest itself gastrointestinally and with headaches.
Basically there is nothing wrong in my joints or intestines to make me feel pain. They are perfectly healthy and normal. However, there is something misfiring in my brain that tells my brain that I am in pain and that there is something wrong. Is it in my head? well sort of. But the pain is truly there. Just because there is no reason to have the pain doesn't not mean the neurons are not sending that message. FMS is directly linked with sleep disturbances, something I have been striken with my entire life. I have also been stricken with inexplainable ailments my entire life and been repeatedley told 'it's in my head.' The irony of it being that the saying is not entirely false, although it is hardly a 'made-up' or 'fake' complaint. The cure: None. Not that, such a thing really phases me by now. I will have a mood disorder for my entire life, what's another chronic illness to add to the list? However you can learn to live with FMS and uncontrolled it can be a debilitating disease. The key is good sleep with no disturbances and exercise. If I'm in pain, tired and feeling sick, exercise! If I want to nap, exercise! The pain releases stress hormones which disturb my sleep which cause more pain. Exercise to keep stress minimal and therefor pain minimal. Also a lot of new age stuff is supposed to help. If I wasn't who I was and not the person I am with medicaitons they may have tried me on tricyclics (a class of anti-depressants) however, they don't want to mess around with my psych meds, so they told me to change my life style.

The odd thing is, the symptoms started to really crop up about a month and a half after I hadn't been dancing for several hours a week. I was scared I'd have to give up my dance career, when in fact dance is probably one of the healthiest careers for me. Who would have known?

Not much more to update. Will have the results of lymes and all the std crap within a week. *rolls eyes* If Dr. Florence said it was bogus I am not worried about the results of all that stuff.

Anyway. I should go. I am exhausted and it's been a long day. Just thought I'd let you all know.

~Elyse

Justin and I have come to a mutual agreement to break up.

I'm hurting but I'll make it.

And just as his favorite DJ; DJ Tiesto says

Love comes again
Just when I've broken out of love
Love can come again
You gotta believe that
Love comes again
Just when I've broken out of love
Love can come again

Well I haven't even been home 24 hours and I am already starting to get the bored kinda itch where it seems there is just NOTHING to do. Sad, I know. So I've been flitting around LJ and I decided to fill out the survey that lauren completed.

Mark with an X the things that are true.

Appearance

[ ] I am shorter than 5'4.
[x] I think I'm ugly sometimes.
[ ] I have many scars.
[ ] I tan easily.
[ ] I wish my hair was a different color.
[ ] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[ ] I have a tattoo.
[x] I am self-conscious about my appearance. (at times)
[ ] I have/had braces.
[x] I wear glasses.
[ ] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100 safe, free of cost, and
scar-free.
[ ] I've been told I'm attractive by a complete stranger.
[ ] I have more than 2 piercings.
[ ] I have piercings in places besides my ears.
[x] I have freckles.


Family/Home Life

[x] I've sworn at my parents.
[ ] I've run away from home. Thought about it a few times
[ ] I've been kicked out of the house.
[x]My biological parents are together.
[ ]I have a sibling less than one year old.
[x] I want to have kids someday.
[ ] I've had children.
[ ] I've lost a child.


School/Work

[x] I'm in school.
[x] I have a job. (well soon atleast)
[x] I've fallen asleep at work/school.
[x] I almost always do my homework.
[x] I've missed a week or more of school.
[x] I've been on the Honor Roll within the last 2 years.
[ ] I failed more than 1 class last year.
[ ] I've stolen something from my job
[ ] I've been fired.


Embarrassment

[ ] I've slipped out a "lol" in a spoken conversation.
[ ] Disney movies still make me cry.
[x] I've peed from laughing.
[x] I've snorted while laughing.
[x] I've laughed so hard I've cried.
[x] I've glued my hand to something.
[x] I've laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
[x] I've had my pants rip in public.

Health

[x] I was born with a disease/impairment. Perhaps? Who knows!
[ ] I've gotten stitches.
[ ] I've broken a bone.
[ ] I've had my tonsils removed.
[x] I've sat in a doctors office with a friend.
[ ] I've had my wisdom teeth removed.
[ ] I had a serious surgery.
[x] I've had chicken pox.


Traveling

[x] I've driven over 200 miles in one day.
[x] I've been on a plane.
[x] I've been to Canada.
[ ] I've been to Mexico.
[ ] I've been to Niagara Falls.
[ ] I've been to Japan.
[ ] I've Celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
[ ] I've been to Europe.
[ ] I've been to Africa.


Experiences

[x ] I've gotten lost in my city.
[x] I've seen a shooting star.
[x] I've wished on a shooting star.
[x] I've seen a meteor shower.
[ ] I've gone out in public in my pajamas.
[x] I've pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
[ ] I've kicked a guy where it hurts.
[ ] I've been to a casino.
[ ] I've been skydiving.
[ ] I've gone skinny dipping.
[x ] I've played spin the bottle.
[ ] I've drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
[ ] I've crashed a car.
[x] I've been Skiing
[x] I've been in a play.
[x] I've met someone in person from the internet. LMAO! Isn't that the story of my life?
[x] I've caught a snowflake on my tongue.
[ ] I've seen the Northern Lights.
[ ] I've sat on a roof top at night.
[ ] I've played chicken.
[x] I've played a prank on someone.
[x] I've ridden in a taxi.
[x] I've seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
[] I've eaten Sushi.
[ ] I've been snowboarding.


Relationships

[ ] I'm single
[x ] I'm in a relationship.
[ ] I'm engaged.
[?] I'm married. Haha, Does it count that Justin and I act like and old married couple?
[ ] I've gone on a blind date.
[x] I've been the dumpee more than the dumper.
[x] I miss someone right now.
[x] I have a fear of abandonment.
[ ] I've cheated in a relationship.
[ ] I've gotten divorced
[x] I've had feelings for someone who didn't have them back.
[x] I've told someone I loved them when I didn't.
[x] I've told someone I didn't love them when I did.
[x] I've kept something from a past relationship.


Sexuality

[x] I've had a crush on someone of the same sex
[x] I've had a crush on a teacher.
[x] I am a cuddler.
[x] I've been kissed in the rain.
[x] I've hugged a stranger.
[ ] I have kissed a stranger.


Honesty/Crime

[x] I've done something I promised someone else I wouldn't
[x] I've done something I promised myself I wouldn't.
[ ] I've snuck out of my house.
[ ] I have lied to my parents about where I am.
[ ] I am keeping a secret from the world
[x] I've cheated while playing a game.
[ ] I've cheated on a test.
[x] I've run a red light. Well not Deliberately!
[ ] I've been suspended from school.
[ ] I've witnessed a crime.
[ ] I've been in a fist fight.
[ ] I've been arrested.
[ ] I've shoplifted.


Drugs/Alcohol

[x] I've consumed alcohol.
[ ] I regularly drink.
[ ] I've passed out from drinking.
[ ] I have passed out drunk at least once in the past 6 months.
[ ] I've smoked weed
[ ] I've taken painkillers when I didn't need them.
[ ] I've eaten shrooms.
[ ] I've popped E.
[ ] I've inhaled Nitrous.
[ ] I've done hard drugs.
[ ] I have cough drops when I'm not sick.
[ ] I can't swallow pills.
[x] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem
[x ] I have been diagnosed with clinical depression. What about Mood Disorder NOS?
[x] I shut others out when I'm depressed.
[x] I take anti-depressants.
[ ] I'm anorexic or bulimic.
[ ] I've slept an entire day when I didn't need it.
[x] I've hurt myself on purpose.
[ ] I'm addicted to self harm.
[x] I've woken up crying.


Death and Suicide

[ ] I'm afraid of dying.
[ ] I hate funerals.
[ ] I've seen someone dying.
[x] Someone close to me has attempted suicide.
[ ] Someone close to me has committed suicide.
[? ] I've planned my own suicide. Thought about it yes, planned no.
[ ] I've attempted suicide.
[x ] I've written a eulogy for myself. IT WAS FOR HEALTH CLASS PEOPLE!

Materialism

[ ] I own over 5 rap CDs.
[ ] I own an iPod or MP3 player.
[ ] I have an unhealthy obsession with anime/manga.
[ ] I own multiple designer purses, costing over $100 a piece.
[x] I own something from Hot Topic.
[ ] I own something from Pac Sun.
[ ] I collect comic books.
[ ] I own something from The Gap.
[x] I own something I got on e-bay.
[ ] I own something from Abercrombie.


Random

[x] I can sing well. (As long as you don't ask justin)
[ ] I've stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
[x] I open up to others easily.
[ ] I watch the news.
[ ] I don't kill bugs. (try my hardest not to)
[ ] I hate hearing songs that sacrifice meaning for the sake of being able to rhyme.
[x] I curse regularly.
[ ] I sing in the shower.
[ ] I am a morning person.
[x] I paid for my cell phone ring tone.
[ ] I'm a snob about grammar.
[ ] I am a sports fanatic.
[ ] I twirl my hair
[ ] I have "x"s in my screen name
[x ] I love being neat
[ ] I love Spam
[ ] I've copied more than 30 CD's in a day
[x] I bake well.
[x] My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, red or blue
[ ] I would wear pajamas to school.
[ ] I like Martha Stewart.
[ ] I know how to shoot a gun.
[x] I am in love with love. (does the idea count?)
[ ] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[x] I laugh at my own jokes.
[x] I eat fast food weekly. (Unfortunately)
[x] I believe in ghosts.
[ ] I am online 24/7, even as an away message.
[ ] I've not turned anything in and still got an A in a certain class.
[ ] I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[x] I am really ticklish.
[ ] I love white chocolate
[ ] I bite my nails.
[x] I play video games.
[x] I'm good at remembering faces.
[ ] I'm good at remembering names
[x] I'm good at remembering dates.
[ ] I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
[x] My answers are totally honest


Ahhh the joys of boredom...perhaps I'll go play a video game...again...for the fourth time today...hehehe.

Hello everyone

My first entry from NY in who knows how long. Yesterday was the day from hell. Let me recount:

My flight on Northwest from RDU to Detroit was supposed to leave at 12:40. So first it was delayed until 1:20 and then it was delayed until 2:30 and soon after that it was cancelled completely. So the people at the gate decided that they couldn't hande everyone at the gate and the flight changes that needed to be made and sent EVERYONE in a mad dash back downstaits to the ticket counter. There I proceeded to wait online for over two hours just to speak to an agent for a few minutes to reroute my flight. The agent was an imbecile and gave me a ridiculous itinerary. I was going to fly to Charlotte at 7:30 and then from Charlotte head to Newark and arrive around 11:30 that was IF all of the planes were on time. THat flight was with US Airways. So when I went to the US Airways counter to REcheck my luggage the guy saw that there was a better route and changed things around. So at 3:00 pm I was booked for a flight at 6:00. Of course the plane was late in arriving and THEN they had to take a break so we had to wait before we could board. The irony of it really. I was waiting in an airport since 11am that morning and we couldn't leave and we risked missing many of our connecting flights because the CREW had to take a BREAK! I mean, yeah I know they are union members and all that, but it was just absolutely absurd and ironic to hear. So I make it to Pittsburgh where my new layover is only to find that my flight to White plains has been delayed until 10:45. Finally got into NY and on the ground around 12:30 but it was the longest day ever.

So I didn't end up going to bed until arounfd 3:20 last night and had to wake up at 8:30 this morning to go a doctor's appointment which was postponed because of the weather. Saw Dr. Miller my mom's chiropractor and he worked absolutele wonders for my back. Am getting tested for lyme disease tomorrow as he thinks that a lot of my problems sound like lyme disease and that the time frame is correct. Right now I don't care what it is as long as I have an answer. Its sad when you would rather be told that you have brain cancer and would die in two months than keep on being told by doctors that all the pain and symptoms you are experiencing are in your head.

That's another whole experience I need to document. I know that Duke Hospital is one of the best hospitals in the country and I don't doubt that, but there is only one stipulation. It's one of the best hospitals in the country if they know what your problem is and can fix it. I was basically blown off by all the doctors both nights I went because I had a psychiatric history. Nothing had ever made me angrier in my life.
Luckily, even though Justin was there with me, he was really supportive. Especially the second night and helped me through it. So my inability to get any quality treatment from ANYONE in NC other than my new psychiatrist has led me to filling my christmas break with doctor's appts. Dentist and Chiropractor today. Chiropractor and Neurologist on Monday. Cardiologist and some other doctor on Wed. Such fun!

Oh well. As long as I get a diagnosis right?!

It's not as weird for me to be home as it seemed to be other people who described the experience. It's like everything is exactly the same, even though the furniture is different and such. Maybe it's because I haven't seen anyone outside my family. But I am sure that will change soon.

Oh! You know I am kinda worried, I had to take and Incomplete for Tom Mould's class and my gpa is now a 2.7 even though I had all As and A- in my other classes. I don't get it. But whatever. As soon as I get the project done I'm sure it will bump up my GPA, but my professors had told me that an incomplete wouldn't affect my GPA. *sigh*

Hope to see all you New Yorkers soon! I miss you!

~Elyse

Well I decided that this morning I was going to get up for 9am Dance Auditions for the Spring Dance concert. I definitely haven't gotten in but I'm not in the least disappointed, as I can't expect to be in tip top shape after not having been to ONE FRIGGIN DANCE CLASS in over 4 months. I'm literally dying inside from my lack of dance. But I must say, for someone who hasn't been to dance for a while I think I did relatively well. Oh and with a neck injury.

See that was my big mistake. I am not dizzy and have a really really bad headache. Of course I knew I took that chance or rather certainty when I went to auditions but I'm still going to complain. hehe. I'm thinking I might have fun picking a play and doing it myself. I want to get out there and have some fun. So I think I might do that. Perhaps some David Ives? hehehe. Perhaps. It would be great.

Anyway. I have to type up the hilarious scene we came up with yesterday for Much Ado about Nothing as well as finish working on that website and Public Service Announcement. Am just going to try to keep updating so I don't fall behind like I always do.


Bye!

~Elyse

Well it's just around time that everyone is freaking out and wanting to kill themselves because of all the work and studying to be done. However I will not be joining that crowd...At least not this year. Because I have found the shield against it. Laughter! Wednesday night Biggs came down to hang with all the cool folks down here at Elon. (Biggs graduated last year and he is in Justin's fraternity) Bigg's is perhaps one of the coolest people ever. Wednesday night a whole bunch of us ended up at the library- Biggs, Rhen, Justin, Me, Duffy, Maggie, Mike, Lee etc. And had a grand old time just bullshitting about nothing.

Then yesterday night. Rhen (lauren) had work again and so Biggs, Rhen, Justin and I were at the library. Since no one EVER shows up for Bio tutoring, she usually has nothing to do. So as she was studying her hebrew and justin was drawing biggs and I played THE FUCKING FUNNIEST GAME EVER! It's called paper wars or something. Lame name for an awesome game. Basically we each had a character. Mine was a clock. I had 6 powers and 6 weaknesses. Biggs was Macho man and his power was to change into any of the village people and take on their traits. Funniest shit ever. We played for a while. I used my powers of pineapples and he almost sucked me into his gay black hole in his ass. Imagine the most politically incorrect game ever with no rules whatsoever and you have paper wars! So then Biggs and I eventually got bored because NO ONE every wins at paper wars. And then Rhen and Lauren played. Rhen was a Jew-taur. Like a centraur but a Jewish one. Justin was ditzamon. Similar to a digimon. It had a face and hair. Powers/weakeness included- Wet T-shirt fights, Jacuzzi tubs, Wal-mart sales, christmas presents, thumb tacks and Marriotti bands. During the game God sent Jesus to hell because he said bad things against Jews, Fat people were made slaves because they ate cheese with barcodes on them and the barcodes were marked on their faces. And the Jewtaur had some fun during spring break and Girls gone Wild. Have some pictures of the white board throughout the game and it is absolutely hilarious. Biggs, Rhen and I MUST get a house together after we all graduate because it's too fucking hilarious when we are together.

And then today I had intro to theatre. We have a group project to finish up the semester. My group is taking a scene from Much Ado About Nothin and modernizing it to Elon. We were originally planning to include a moulin rouge type thing and add well known songs to express what was happening in the story but by the time we translated the two scenes to modern times, It was far too hilarious to even need songs. It's gonna be a great project.

Thus, Laughter is my salvation. But I am going to go play Kingdom Hearts now I think so I'll right more another time. Talk to you soon. Good luck during Crunch Time!

Fuck You Tom Mould.

I love you to death but I will commit suicide before I take another one of your classes! I'm a fucking freshman, alright? WHY am I being graded on changing the fucking world when all you've taught us this semester is how our very fucked up world is impossibly fucked up?!

GAH! Isn't the purpose of school breaks to provide rest and relaxation so that we can recover enough to focus on our studies and upcoming FINALS? My thanksgiving break has been everything but relaxing.

Between High tensions and way too much homework thanks to HE WHO MUST NOT BE NAMED *cough* Tom Mould *cough* I am sitting here wanting to rip my brains out instead of enjoying my time with my grandparents.

So what triggered this outburst? Well I just tried to register a domain name and buy some network space but apparently they didn't want to accept my credit card. SOO Elyse has no way to pay for her website which she must make for TOM MOULD because she has to change the world on mental illness stigma. By the way, Y'all When I have this friggin website up after I finish writing up all the stupid information I order you all to come to it because I can't change the world if no one comes to the website and it's gonna be good....hopefully.

AND THEN I spent the entire afternoon trying to figure out how the hell to use imovie so that I can create my friggin Public Service Announcement to go along with my website. I have a whole 25 seconds of words after 3 hours of working on nothing! Gah!

On top of that I have my Tech Production presentation to be making on Scenic Drops due Wed. And I have FINALS TO START STUDYING FOR!

Gah they are like a week and a half away. If I was Hermione I would have been studying back in September for them. I'm so freaked by them, mostly because they are my first college finals and I'm scared to death I will bomb them and plummet the nice GPA I have had to a 0.00. I Know I have been lucky well until like a week ago. But again Tom Mould. I spend Hours and hours writing a 16 page research paper for him and I get a B. He's the hardest grader I have ever seen in my life. Worse than Whiffen was. Except he is much better looking and a lot of fun and I adore his class just not the work so I can't hate him.

Please, someone save me. How many hours until I can put Dear old Tom behind me forever? I know I've learned a shit load since I've taken his class. I actually care about the world. It's weird. And I can do damn good research as well. I know the databases by heart. But for all you PV people that complained about Public Policy, it has nothing on Global with Tom Mould. And the most frustrating part is that for almost every other student taking Global, it is a breeze. I wish I had Jack as my global teacher, it would have been so much easier. *Sigh*
I'm so sick of researching mental illness stigma. Can't I just set our a bigger banner and say. "We're not all crazy so please be nice"
*SCREAMS*
And on top of that I am working on a MODEM internet connection. And I am just so restless with life that I can't stand being here much longer. Thank god I leave tomorrow.

Talk to you all soon,
FYTM
Even though I love you and are quite possibly the best teacher I have ever had.
FY
~Elyse

Wow. I can't believe I haven't updated since..well whenever my last update was. I could have sworn that I updated sooner. Ah well. What can I say? Thanksgiving break is a week away. Life is...well. complicated and dramatic but I'm still enjoying it. I love Elon to bits. It's the best damn place in the universe.

Seeing Cirque de Soleil this weekend with Justin and his family who are super awesome and I love them to death.

Found out last week that the reason I've been so sick all semester is because I have some severe neck problems. Turns out that my neck is completely out of alignment and there is only one joint in my neck that is working so the chiropractor now has to break in all the joints in my neck so that it will work properly again. Rather painful. He said that I'm gonna have a flare up soon. I hope not tomorrow! Also said that the plane ride is gonna aggravate it but hopefully I'll be okay.

I intended to write much more by I got caugh up talking to all three boys I have ever dated along with many of my other friends so I ended up not focusing too much on livejournal.

I promise to update more.

Talk to you soon

~Elyse

I love Elon. I don't ever want to leave this friggin place. The people are amazing. The Faculty are amazing. The Events are amazing (well except for Joyce Leader) I FRIGGIN LOVE ELON. Coming here was the best choice I could have ever made and I have no regretted it once!

There is waaaaaay too much to talk about since my last entry so I'll give you a list of everything I've been doing.

1. Seeing all too much of that great boyfriend of mine
2. Changed my future career plans ten times. They are currently A plan to double major in English, Creative writing and Acting if I get into the program, Dance if I don't.
3. Voice lessons with Pam, She's so cool.
4. Started private lessons with Richard Gang who I love now that I realize he's not all that scary
5. Did Spot light for West Side Story
6. Got sick and move to Deck crew for West Side Story
7. Found out my Myer's Briggs personality type: ENTP. Alex and I have the same type....Scary!
8. Alex and I are friends now. Yay!
9. Made tons of new friends.
10. Met the JERKS who I absolutely love. They are really awesome people
11. Have found a 'lauren' at Elon. Her name is Allison and she used to date Alex. hahahaha
12. Been to a passion party and bought some interesting stuff
13. Been converted to listening to dance, house, ambience, and trance which is amazing. Also own hot topic pants, skater shoes, a beanie and a wrist band. I am also learning to skateboard. All courtesy of Justin
14. Start watching anime
15. Started Playing video games. Again all courtesy of Justin
16. Had one shot. Really wanted to get drunk this past weekend though.
17. Spent way too much money at South Point the coolest mall ever
18. Met all the gay people to meet to my heart's desire
19. Been away from home!!!!!
20. Had 24 ours access to Ben and Jerry's icecream (or just about)
21. Learned not to fall off my bed when I am asleep
22. Fed a homeless kitty who only used us as he is using EVERYONE on campus
23. Helped support an ANTI-WALMART revolution. go to www.walmartmovie.com
24. Changed me meds, have countless unexplainable symptoms and horrible backpain which I will see a chiropractor about tomorrow
25. Other stuff but I need to go eat dinner with Elyse.

Will update soon!

~Elyse

Wow. I can't believe how long it's been since I've updated. Far too long and I feel sort of guilty. My only consolation is that it hasn't been as long as Justin who still hasn't updated since he left D.C.!!!

Anyway I don't even know where to start. So I'll throw this out there, that if any of you have questions you want to ask about how everything is, comment and I'll respond. hehe.

Hmm perhaps I'll make a list of all the great things that I have been going on. The are in no order in particular.

1. I really love walking around campus now and knowing people. I'm so glad that I picked Elon. A small school was definitely the way to go for me. I'm still meeting a bunch of new people, but I really love having familiar faces. I also love seeing random people that I kind of know and striking up conversation with them. That's always fun, although a but unnerving when they know your name but you don't know their's!

2. My schedule is amazingly easy. My advisor is a bit worried since I have basically no academics. But that's alright. All my classes are amazing. Even Global which is making me consider going into Sociology. I'm gonna meet up with Tom (my global teacher) who has a dr. in cultural anthropology and talk about it all. Next semester It looks like I'll be taking BA Acting, Latin, Intro to Sociology, Model UN, Web Design (It's a two credit course that is interesting and will fill the rest of my science general ed req.) Hopefully Two dance classes and private voice which will give me a nice rounded 18 hour credit load again and will probably be slightly more challenging.

3. Again my schedule is amazingly easy. Global is fun, although a lot of work. Tech producion is pretty cool. Learning a lot of construction stuff. Been tying knots. Intro to theatre is nice as we watch movies every Monday. hehe. Gotta love college. And then I have Make-up Application and Design which is a lot of fun. Had to design an old Librarian with make up for homework tonight. It's harder than you think. And it requires me to be artistic! It's a lot better than I expected it to be too!

4. Jill is the supercoolest roommate in the world. I love her! It was such a good idea rooming together. Our suitemates are awesome too. Cassandra went back home so Emily moved in with Heath. and now we only have eight to our two stalls but that's not problem seeing as we haven't had any issues with showers as of yet. Or at least I haven't. Jill has done an AMAZING job decoraring our suite. The mural of a phoenix on the wall is great! and she's taken pictures of all of the suite mates and hunge them in the front hall way. And then the other wall is going to be all of the visitors to the suite.

5. Justin is awesometastic. It's amazing being down here with him. We haven't gotten sick of each other yet. Although we do 'fight' constantly. I tell him I hate him on a regular basis so as you can see, we have a very strong foundation for our relationship. :P But seriously he is just awesome. He's rubbing off on me. I drink juice all time, Have been listening to 'cat throw up' music (sorry inside joke between me Jill and Justin, the three of us together are hilarious!), I actually eat BREAKFAST!! I'm watching anime, which by the way, I have no idea why I was against it all those years ago or thought it was dumb. I've only watched half of one series and I already enjoy it and want to see more. And then with all the crap that's been going on. Moodswings and trips to the Emergency Room, Justin has been absolutely amazing (Jill and Elyse T. as well) and I am so happy. (I just feel sorta bad for including all this stuff when I know some of you are going through withdrawl with your bfs at home)

6. Um my eyes are starting to cross so I think I'm gonna go. but I'll write more soon! Just wanted to update so you know that I was still alive and loving every second of Elon!!!!

Wow,

I can't believe the day has finally come. I'm going to college. Everything is packed. I've said all my goodbyes. And not tearfully at all! Although I did start crying when I thought I wouldn't be able to see Lauren. Luckily I did! Britt and I went to her house and bothered her there. Then her dad invited us out to dinner with them, so we all went to dinner (Lauren, Joe, Her mom, dad, grandma, Brittney and I) at Charlie Brown's. Then Britt and I went back to her house and watched some Gilmore Girls. Joe and Lauren stopped by later and we all went to Cold Stone before it closed. What's up with them not having any cake batter icecream?! Anyway. We went outside. Talked about rape whistles and banging teachers. Some ghetto white guys were acting really dumb right infront of the mall security dude, who turned out to be a real tough guy listening to celine dion type music in his security car.

Yeah so that was all good and then Today I packed up the car, made some last minute stops. Said goodbye to my grandparents on my dad's side. That was interesting. Chatted with my grandma for a bit and she said some interesting things. But I definitely bonded with her. And when I've spent most of my life dreading visits with Grandma and Grandpa L, simply because there was no bond, it was a big thing. I felt really good after visiting them.

And then I had my last dinner at home and my last dessert at home. I'm going to have my last night in my bed, well at least until Dec. and as the subject says, this is my last entry.

By the time I write again I shall be:
At Elon
Moved into my room
United with my love
Happier than I can even imagine.

WELCOME NEW LIFE, HERE I COME!!!!

You are a Cancer, the funniest sign of the zodiac.
You are family-oriented, loyal, lovable, kind,
sensitive, intuitive and imaginitive! You are
very, very protective of your friends, and you
give them great advice! The animal you are most
like is, a crab! Crabs are very smart, mabe
thats why they have lived for over 500 million
years! Crabs have a tough exteriorin which they
hide their soft-selfs (just like you and your
emotions). And just like the crab, you have two
ways to go in life, the hard lifeless shell or
the heart!

-your lucky colors are sea green(the color of your
home, the sea) and silver(the color of the
moon)

-your metal is silver (me:didnt see that one
comming*note the sarcasum*)

-your precious stone is a pearl

-your lucky day of the week is monday

-your element is water


-the planet you are ruled by is the moon, hey your
just like the tides, you know the moon makes
the tides go in and out!! Oh well, guess not

-the parts of the body that you rule are your
stomach and breasts(me:stop giggling, he he)

-your true love comes from a scorpio, pisces,
taurus, or your own cancer!


What is Your TRUE Astrology Sign? (for guys and girls with incredibly detailed answers and incredible pictures+READ MEMO PLEASE)
brought to you by Quizilla


Hmm This is pretty accurate considering I am July 23 and consider myself to be a crabby lion because the stupid astrology people can never decided if I am a cancer or a leo.hehe. So yeah. I guess being a crabby lion really is me!